@MomoFali feel better... in reply to MomoFali 7 hrs ago

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Songs From My Past: One More Night

Monday, September 6th, 2010

I know a lot of people who think Phil Collins is cheesy and I don’t give a shit.

This song…wow. This one goes back to high school. Junior year. My boyfriend and I, this was our song, you couldn’t tell us shit about this song. Then he went away to college and it became even more meaningful. And then…slowly…we grew apart, and it took on a whole new meaning for me. He went on to the woman who would eventually become his wife, while I went on to go out with a complete fucking moron.  He was marriage material, that one. (Not the moron, the other one.) But I was way too young to be thinking of marriage. (I still think I’m too young to get married but do not tell my husband, okay?)

Oh fuck, he reads the blog!  Shhhhh!!!

Well, I still love this song.

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Posted in The Mind | No Comments »

Sometimes, Shit DOES Happen…And It’s Hard To Deal With

Saturday, September 4th, 2010

iPad+potty=no poop; he's so busy playing games he forgets to push.

Update on the Pudding butt impasse:

He did poop.

Two days ago.

He did not poop yesterday. So far today, nada.

I can’t blame him. The poop that he did manage to push out was so hard and uncomfortable that I swear he got a taste of what it was like for me to push him out.  The laxative was forcing him to go but it was so tough, poor thing. I felt awful.

He felt better immediately afterwards, but seriously, no one wants to repeat that experience.  Grown people don’t want to go through that, so it’s no wonder that a 3-year old who is still perplexed about the whole poo-on-the-potty experience has decided to put his butt on lockdown.

Unfortunately, however, I am going to have take this shit to DefCon 4 level and go in with a suppository, which will then make it easier for him to just poop on the potty as opposed to giving birth to his poops.

Wish me luck.

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Posted in The Fam | No Comments »

Well, What I Meant Was, But Sort Of Not Really, And Seriously, Yes. Except Not Quite.

Thursday, September 2nd, 2010

You ever talk to someone, and you’re trying to explain something that is extremely important or deep to you and you’re trying to convey that to them, but the more you talk, the more it’s not sounding right, and you keep talking in hopes of clearing it up, only it’s not getting clearer at all it’s actually getting more convoluted by the minute, but you keep talking because you really want them to feel where you’re coming from, but then you go over what you’ve just said in your head and it sounds incredibly stupid so you’re trying to make it sound sensible, but there are words that are already coming out of your mouth because your stupid ass mouth is 10 steps behind your brain, so these useless fucking words that are just confusing the issue are getting jumbled up with the words that could actually make some goddamn sense if they had only come out first but now not only have you managed to confuse the hell out of your own damn self while trying to simultaneously edit the shit you already said along with the shit you were about to say but the other person is listening to you with one eyebrow raised and a suspicious silence that you’re hoping means they think you’re so deep that they’re just fucking speechless but you know deep down it means that they’re sitting there thinking “what the fuck are you TALKING about?” and the only reason they haven’t written you off totally yet is because they’re trying to give you the benefit of the doubt but they’re about two seconds from suddenly “remembering” some important shit that they really need to do right now so they can get away from you and your supposedly deep thoughts and you’re listening to your own mouth having verbal diarrhea and you wish you could go back in time and start all over again because now there’s no way to clean this crap up and make it sound lucid, even if you could possibly start to sound intelligent now it’s too late because you still have the history of all the poorly verbalized shit that you vomited out first and the only ways you can think of to make it right with this person is either to hire a sniper to take them the fuck out or wait for them to get Alzheimer’s and hopefully lose the memory of how stupid you are and even with all of that going through your head unbelievably enough you are STILL FUCKING TALKING although you’ve long since admitted that even to yourself you sound like a COMPLETE FUCKING IDIOT? HUH? EVER HAD THAT?

Nope, me neither.

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Posted in The Mind | No Comments »

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I know a lot of people who think Phil Collins is cheesy and I don’t give a shit.

This song…wow. This one goes back to high school. Junior year. My boyfriend and I, this was our song, you couldn’t tell us shit about this song. Then he went away to college and it became even more meaningful. And then…slowly…we grew apart, and it took on a whole new meaning for me. He went on to the woman who would eventually become his wife, while I went on to go out with a complete fucking moron.  He was marriage material, that one. (Not the moron, the other one.) But I was way too young to be thinking of marriage. (I still think I’m too young to get married but do not tell my husband, okay?)

Oh fuck, he reads the blog!  Shhhhh!!!

Well, I still love this song.

Tags: ,
Posted in The Mind | No Comments »

Sometimes, Shit DOES Happen…And It’s Hard To Deal With

September 4th, 2010

iPad+potty=no poop; he's so busy playing games he forgets to push.

Update on the Pudding butt impasse:

He did poop.

Two days ago.

He did not poop yesterday. So far today, nada.

I can’t blame him. The poop that he did manage to push out was so hard and uncomfortable that I swear he got a taste of what it was like for me to push him out.  The laxative was forcing him to go but it was so tough, poor thing. I felt awful.

He felt better immediately afterwards, but seriously, no one wants to repeat that experience.  Grown people don’t want to go through that, so it’s no wonder that a 3-year old who is still perplexed about the whole poo-on-the-potty experience has decided to put his butt on lockdown.

Unfortunately, however, I am going to have take this shit to DefCon 4 level and go in with a suppository, which will then make it easier for him to just poop on the potty as opposed to giving birth to his poops.

Wish me luck.

Tags: ,
Posted in The Fam | No Comments »

Well, What I Meant Was, But Sort Of Not Really, And Seriously, Yes. Except Not Quite.

September 2nd, 2010

You ever talk to someone, and you’re trying to explain something that is extremely important or deep to you and you’re trying to convey that to them, but the more you talk, the more it’s not sounding right, and you keep talking in hopes of clearing it up, only it’s not getting clearer at all it’s actually getting more convoluted by the minute, but you keep talking because you really want them to feel where you’re coming from, but then you go over what you’ve just said in your head and it sounds incredibly stupid so you’re trying to make it sound sensible, but there are words that are already coming out of your mouth because your stupid ass mouth is 10 steps behind your brain, so these useless fucking words that are just confusing the issue are getting jumbled up with the words that could actually make some goddamn sense if they had only come out first but now not only have you managed to confuse the hell out of your own damn self while trying to simultaneously edit the shit you already said along with the shit you were about to say but the other person is listening to you with one eyebrow raised and a suspicious silence that you’re hoping means they think you’re so deep that they’re just fucking speechless but you know deep down it means that they’re sitting there thinking “what the fuck are you TALKING about?” and the only reason they haven’t written you off totally yet is because they’re trying to give you the benefit of the doubt but they’re about two seconds from suddenly “remembering” some important shit that they really need to do right now so they can get away from you and your supposedly deep thoughts and you’re listening to your own mouth having verbal diarrhea and you wish you could go back in time and start all over again because now there’s no way to clean this crap up and make it sound lucid, even if you could possibly start to sound intelligent now it’s too late because you still have the history of all the poorly verbalized shit that you vomited out first and the only ways you can think of to make it right with this person is either to hire a sniper to take them the fuck out or wait for them to get Alzheimer’s and hopefully lose the memory of how stupid you are and even with all of that going through your head unbelievably enough you are STILL FUCKING TALKING although you’ve long since admitted that even to yourself you sound like a COMPLETE FUCKING IDIOT? HUH? EVER HAD THAT?

Nope, me neither.

Tags:
Posted in The Mind | No Comments »

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